Show of hands who here was ever thirsting after their mother? Hopefully nobody raised their hand, but our main character this week, Agostino, can certainly not say the same.
I can’t believe the start of this book started like it did. I’m actually a little bit traumatized, but I guess obviously not as bad as Agostino was traumatized on the boat ride home with his mom and the young man. I feel like all of us (especially as we grow up) really rebel against imagining our parents as any sort of potential sexual beings- the mere thought of it grosses us out. That’s why it alarmed me so much to see Agostino interact or describe his mom as such. So I don’t really know what to make of his gradual descent from seeing his mom through a more filial lens which gradually turned more and more sexual. Before the whole incest thing really went into 5th gear, I thought that his mother’s actions were quite peculiar, this sort of looseness and unabashed behaviour, but now looking back, its hard to tell if his mother lacked this sort of sense of boundary or that the narration was a bit deceptive to reveal I guess the subconscious thoughts that Agostino didn’t really put a name to just yet.
As hard as it is to move on from talking about potential incest, there’s something else about this book that caught my attention. The rustle and tussle of the male friendships within this book is something that fascinates me and I think I see it sometimes in real life too. I don’t think the relationship between these young boys are representative of all or even most young male friendships, but this sort of crude and tough wrestling into a social hierarchy seems quite common among younger males, especially as I recall my experiences in middle school. The reason why this intrigues me is not only because the female equivalent is LARGELY different, but also the actual psychological effects in my view are quite worth looking into; I feel like this might be how inferiority complexes develop.
In some sense, I think that all of us can relate to Agostino in some ways (obviously not in the incestuous way, hopefully). I personally really connected with his emotions about losing your identity whilst not having acquired a new one just yet, and how lost that makes you feel in the moment to have to be suspended in the air like that, not yet knowing what pieces will fall into place.
This week my question to you all is: What do you think referring to his mother as “Big” means in this novel? What does it signify or how does it serve the author’s purpose?
Kelly, I think it is important to return to the idea you raise in your blog: how are gender relations, between men and between men and women, portrayed in the novel? We know very little about the relationships that the mother would have with other women, except those that could occur at parties at her house. What does this tell us about the story we read?
Hi Kelly! This week I did’t read Agostino, but rather read Nada by Laforet. However, I was intrigued to see why so many people were talking about incest in Agostino and I stumbled upon your post. I think you give a thorough insight as to how disturbing the novel was. I was particularly interested in what you had to say about losing him losing his identity, because I can make a parallel with Nada, in which the main character Andrea was trying to find her own identity amongst a bunch of really messed up people.
I think he was referring to his mother as big to the world and not in the sense as being a big person. And specifically I think this relates to her personality and her bashfulness to the world treating life as there is on care for the world. I feel though Agostino stops describing her this way as his world view opens and he sees his mom trying to appeal to the boatman to be femininely fragile.
Hi Kelly!
I really liked reading your thoughts on Agostino, I shared a lot of the same sentiments about the weird dynamics between family members. I thought, although crude, that “Big” meant that his mother was a full-figured woman, and that when Agostino mentioned her in that way, it came from his infatuation with her.
Hi Kelly!
I really found your thoughts interesting and agree that the way Agostino perceived his mother could be uncomfortable. A thought of yours that I’m glad you brought up was that you related to how Agostino felt a lost of identity while not having acquired a new one yet. In fact, I almost forgot how this was another part to his complex mental battle between preserving innocence and losing it.
Hi Kelly, I just want to say that I really like the way you write in your blog posts! It’s quite comedic and makes it more engaging to reflect on and think about commenting. While I do not have any real thoughts on how Agostino refers to his mother as big. I do find your comment on how the relationships between boys depicted in this story interesting, I’m currently in a sociology class that is exploring masculinity (SOCI 314) and I personally found that these boys were really good illustrations of the overcompensation thesis. This is an idea that looks at how when boys masculinities are threatened, they reach to extreme expressions of masculinity to make up for what they lack, and the boys in this case lack financial and physical security. The way hegemonic masculine ideals as well were very clear and from what I’ve read, while there are more varieties of masculinity that has evolved to now, hegemonic masculine ideals are still very rampant and present in today’s youth.
I think he refers to her as big as a symbol of who she represents in his life. She is the biggest role model in his life because his dad is not there. Also of course, he says that about her body and this I think is just genuine curiosity. He has not seen a body other than his and he is stating facts about his observations.
Hi! i really loved your thoughts! I feel like maybe big refers to his mother taking on such a big role in his life? but also in class we discussed how the role she took on might not always lead to the move positive outcomes but I super love your insight