This week I was intrigued by a very important question that one of my English professors asked my class, “What is sadness for?”. We were discussing a film, Inside Out, to support The Affect Theory that he introduced to us early on in the week. According to Silvan Tomkins, in his novel, “Affect Imagery Consciousness”, the affect theory is when affects, or “biological portion of emotion” are sorted into different discrete categories and triggered to perform a certain response. For example, when a person feels the affect joy, he/she generally displays smiling. When my professor asked us this question, I suddenly dreamed of a world without sadness. The world felt brighter if we are all happy and positive. However, like most dreams that I have, they aren’t always true, valid, or plausible. We, in fact, need sadness in our lives whether we like it or not.
Our class started brainstorming many great ideas, that sadness is for coping with loss and agony in our lives. My friend mentioned that “sadness is there so we don’t take happiness for granted.” In the end of the lecture, we came to the conclusion that in the act of sadness, care can be taken; sadness helps us take care of ourselves and others. Sadness then becomes one of our defence mechanisms. It alerts us that something in our bodies/ lives require our utmost attention.
We now live in an idealized society where a good life means being constantly happy. We are so immersed in this idea from everyday influences that it seems like if we feel sadness, there is something lacking in our lives, that we’re not “doing it right” and we should just “get over it.” I wonder, how do we get over an emotion, as if it’s something we can change like the colour of our hair or the clothes that we wear.
In reference to one of my favourite John Green quotes, “without pain (sadness in this case), how could we know joy?” Perhaps we live in a world where we need that equilibrium. We must have two opposite emotions and feel each of them at separate times to have a balanced and fulfilling life.
What do you think sadness is for? Comment below and let’s start talking about our emotions! It’s a conversation that is not spoken of enough, especially in today’s society. There is nothing wrong with feeling and expressing our emotions. There certainly is no shame in admitting this emotion, sadness. Our emotions, whatever they are, are all valid and deserve to be felt because there is no need to hide them. We can’t be happy all the time, or else our happiness wouldn’t be worth anything.
Written by Charlotte Nip