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It was a long, long time ago when trolls moved in great numbers across vast Norwegian plains that Nora was only a small child, and was warned about their dangers. The youngest in a family of boys, Nora was a curious child, and enjoyed exploring the forests around her village.

One particularly shadowy night, Nora’s curiosity led her into the forest just behind the soft lights of her village. She didn’t dare tell any of the elders, as there were recent whispers of evil mountain trolls moving closer to the human villages, and she was forbidden from exploring at that hour. She innocently clutched a simple doll, made of straw, and braved into the mysterious dark woods. Mesmerized by giant canopy trees and the faint murmur of woodland creatures, Nora became easily disoriented. She was suddenly aware of her surroundings and how unfamiliar they looked as the light began to grow dimmer. Panic struck, and she grasped on to a thorny branch, scraping her palm, then stepped onto a slippery stone. Thud. She fell, onto the moist forest floor. Her head hit a larger stone, and she could feel the wind being sucked out of her. She looked to the forest ceiling just as her eyelids closed, one last glimpse the dark night sky before everything was black.

Hours later, Nora’s eyelids were heavy and it seemed that everything around her was spinning. Struggling, her eyes half opened to see watch a blurry, dark, forest rushing past her. Confusion swept over as she noticed that a large, bark-skinned creature appeared to be carrying her. With thoughts of trolls flashing through her head, Nora again slipped into a blackened consciousness.

Startled again, Nora awoke to two creatures that seemed to be arguing over her. One was large, stout, with blackened bark-skin and menacing yellow eyes, carried a sharply angled stone. Arguing with the creature was another, shorter companion, with dim purple eyes and a soft brown colored bark coat. She turned to Nora, cradled her in her arms, and with gentle eyes, whispered a spell in strange tongue that caused Nora to, again, slip into her dreamy state of darkness.

This time, when Nora opened her eyes, things were clearer. She felt better, her senses coming back to her, forming the familiar sight of a house hole in the dark night. As she slowly came back to consciousness, Nora realized she had been lost, deep in the unknown forest. But how had she gotten here, safely, back home? Confused, Nora turned just in time to catch the glint of two purple eyes watching over her at the edge of the woods. Quickly, the creature that they belonged to turned and disappeared back into the dark.

Nora, now one of the elders of her village, to this day believes that it was a mountain troll that saved her life that day, through her faint memories. Once a month, she leaves out an offering to them – three ripe figs and a dandelion – a troll’s favorite meal, along with her little straw doll. And every so often, just for a second, there will be the glimpse of those familiar purple eyes.

—Chloe Jung

“‘T’ for ‘Tea'”

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If one wanted to find a Spiddyock, and there were many reasons for such an inquiry, a great deal of searching was in order and it was likely to be an ordeal.

The Spiddyocks are the modest type. Their homes, the same design as one may find in a common suburb, are not concentrated in a “ghetto” sort of way. They are spread out. Intentionally. Not of their own intention of course, but by the Bureau of Spiddyock Management. If they had it their own way, they would live together in a “ghetto” sort of way away from the entire human population. But they would never tell you that, of course.

I sat down for tea with a Spiddyock, once. Earl Grey of course, but there was no honey. At first it struck me as strange; Restricting oneself to one type of meat, be it American, Canadian or Manchurian, and cutting out all other animal products. But with this Spiddyock, that was a personal choice that I found almost entirely respectable.  So I took sugar.

It wasn’t difficult to find this one. He was quite open about his practices. His culinary reviews had begun to acquire a following amongst the older generation and upon my call, he insisted I come to him for our interview.

The Human census bureau controls the Spiddyock’s food stamps. If the Spiddyocks were in need, at any time, of an extra arm or leg, the census bureau accommodates their need and put their “Federal Food On the Go” services into action. However, Bureau of Population Management (BPM) handles the main food intake for the Spiddyocks.

“They do keep us bogged down with all their legislation, but what’s food is food and we can’t complain if we aint hungry.” The National Government keeps a heavy census tally on the Spiddyocks’ food intake, which is to be logged and officially certified after every meal, according to the BPM (who declined to answer questions for this interview.)

This fine Spiddyock allowed me the spectator’s seat as he prepared his breakfast. He usually preferred a European for breakfast as the Westerners tended to bog him down later in the day because of their high carb intake. His spice cabinet was extensive.

The kitchenware consisted of one large Martha Stewart cast-iron cauldron.

Unfortunately, I was unable to stay for the eating of Breakfast as the Spiddyock’s family was soon to arrive and family meetings tended to usually end in another meal, of which I wished not to be a part.

The Spiddyock’s part in society remains essential as overpopulation is a constant threat. They have absorbed themselves into our culture while continuing to practice their own specific rituals while not under watch of the human eye. It is not likely that one may find such an open and social Spiddyock as I was fortunate to stumble upon, yet if any of you readers out there are ever granted with the pleasure of meeting one, don’t wear too much perfume and keep a positive attitude and you may be invited for lunch.

—Noah Cohen