Peer Review of ‘Proposal for the reduction of single-use plastics in a small food stall’

To: Jenny Zhang, Student of ENGL 301

From: Meagan Rosenberg, Peer of ENGL 301

Date: October 11, 2019

Subject: Review of Your Document – “Proposal for the reduction of single-use plastics in a small food stall”

Link to Definition: https://blogs.ubc.ca/engl301-99a-2019wa/2019/10/09/formal-report-proposal-reducing-the-amount-of-single-use-plastic/

 

Hey Jenny! I had a chance to review your document “Proposal for the reduction of single-use plastics in a small food stall”. Please see below as I would like to offer a few suggestions regarding your document:

First Impressions: It was an easy read and such a great idea for a proposal! With everything happening about climate change around the world I bet this will be very helpful to the owner of the food stall. The only critical error noted that stood out while reviewing was a few grammar, spelling and punctuation errors which will be touched on in the review!

Overall Document Lay-out and Design: The document is very well organized with easy to follow sub headings. The font- including size and boldness are nicely done.

Introduction: Very well written, good information about your topic that grabbed my attention – as many of us eat out frequently and use single-use plastics daily. The statistics mentioned throughout the introduction should be cited properly.

Statement of Problem: Again, great information provided that would make the reader want to help with this problem, but no citations are used with the statistics.

Proposed Solution: The solutions  provided with hoping the food stall can provide more environmentally friendly single-use items and having the food court reuse the dishes and cutlery are great solutions. A recommendation would be changing the subheading to ‘Proposed Solutions’ as there are two offered solutions.

Scope: There was great thought into the questions to ask to assess the feasibility of the project, including questions to the owner(s), staff and consumers. This will provide a lot of data to work with- which will help when preparing your formal report. Under question 2 of the list it says ‘Is the owners willing’, This is a bit unclear if it’s one or two owners as the next subheading ‘Intended Readers’ mentions one owner. If it is one owner, a suggestion would be taking the ‘s’ off owner in that question.

Intended Readers: This was straight to the point, and easy to understand as it makes sense. A suggestion would be to change the first sentence by taking out the word ‘to’, so it reads ‘My intended reader is the owner of the food stall’.

Methods: Very well thought out methods that provided a lot of options to collect data from which will beneficial for the final report!

My qualifications: There are a great set of qualifications listed that will be helpful  to make a great report. A suggestion would be to make for this subheading is possibly adding in that you have always been passionate about being environmentally friendly or something along the lines of this!

Conclusion: The conclusion was solid, it summed up the proposal and solution without dragging on!

Citations/ References: After reading over the document it was noticed there are a couple statistics without citations. A recommendation is to have proper in-text citations and a references list (unless these are your own thoughts!).

Grammar, Punctuation and Spelling: There are a few minor grammar and spelling errors in the document;

• Under ‘Statement of Problem’ paragraph in the sixth sentence; ‘shoreline litter and 2 percent of litter’ – I believe adn is supposed to be ‘and’.
• Under ‘My Qualifications’ paragraph in the third sentence it states ‘As I handed people there orders’ it should be ‘their’ and not ‘there’. Also, under this subheading in the fourth sentence a suggestion to change ‘frequented’ to ‘frequent’ as I am assuming you are still visiting the food stall regularly.
• Under the ‘Proposed Solution’ in the sixth sentence– where there is a list of included products, there should be a colon after used and not a comma.
• Suggestion to capitalize each word in the title of your document.

Concluding Comments: I am hoping you can understand these suggestions for editing your document:

• Adding in-text citations and a references list (if necessary)
• Change the subheading for proposed solution to plural
• Clarify the number of owners, then changing the wording a bit under the ‘Scope’ and ‘Intended readers’ as suggested above
• Edit the grammar, spelling and punctuation errors
• Think about adding in a statement under ‘My Qualifications’ about your environmentally friendliness

Your document was very well written, and intriguing! I can’t wait to read the final report, as this is a very hot topic in todays world. Please let me know if you have any questions or would like to talk about my suggestions! Thanks for a good read.