Proust’s “Combray” was definitely challenging for me to follow along, with its lengthy sentences and extremely detailed descriptions of his own memories. I found the plot dreary at first. That said, I appreciated how Proust depicts the scenes where he drowns in his own thoughts, creating a gloomy atmosphere right from the start that signals readers that they are about to immerse in his mind. The constant references to darkness and light, exemplified by the blown-out candlesticks, midnights, and moonlight connect with both Proust’s and readers’ sense of sight, hearing, and imagination, enabling readers to visualize Proust’s struggle to make sense of everything. Proust writes, “I would go back to sleep, and would sometimes afterward wake again for brief moments only, long enough to hear the organic creak of the woodwork, open my eyes and stare at the kaleidoscope of the darkness…” (4). Proust also evokes a sense of loneliness which I deemed as a key feature in the section.

I noticed that the setting of the novel is almost always centred on his bedroom and his childhood residence. This made me think about how we would associate bedrooms with comfort and solace, yet Proust’s portrayal of his bedroom is somewhat depressing. It becomes the place where Proust ponders the question of his state of mind; specifically, whether he was in the state of wakefulness or unconsciousness.

The blurriness of memories is another theme, and I liked how Proust inserts fragments to express his confusion about identity, instead of simply outlining his memories chronologically. “I lost all sense of the place in which I had gone to sleep, and when I awoke, not knowing who I was, I could not even be sure at first who I was…” (5). Proust delves into his own mind, and it seems to me that he is tangled by his own thoughts. His mind was like a labyrinth. While reading Proust’s work, his boundless mind intrigued me because when it comes to memories of his mother and his times spent in Combray, he regains consciousness again.

I adored how Proust depicts his relationship with his mother. Proust rarely uses phrases such as “love” and “affection”, yet he effectively conjures up heartwarming scenes of intimacy. He writes, “So much so I reached the point of hoping that this goodnight which I loved so much would come as late as possible…” (15). The fact that they were written from a child’s perspective was interesting to me because they contrasted with Proust’s delineation of the adults as a world of hypocrisy. For instance, his great-aunt and others are portrayed as opinionated adults as they often gossip about Swann, such as his love life and his social circle. Such a contrast thus magnifies the simplicity of Proust’s childhood life and innocence since he only ever covets for his mother’s love. Also, I loved how Proust seamlessly injects the complexity of emotions, rejecting the binary assumptions of love/misery. He says, “My body, conscious that its own warmth was operating hers, would strive to become one with her… I would abandon myself altogether to this end” (5). While I interpreted the use of strong diction as his way of connecting with his memories, I thought this could be viewed as misery emerging from love. His sense of longing features both melancholy and love in the section, and I must say that Proust’s sophistication in his writing was inspiring.

Hence, this leads to my question: What is the significance of sensorial experiences to Proust’s depiction of his memories?