To: Meagan Rosenberg, English 301 Student
From: Jenny Zhang, English 301 Student
Date: October 11, 2019
Subject: Review of Formal Report Proposal – Proposal for Decreasing Needlestick Injuries at Arden Park Dental
I have read through your proposal for decreasing needlestick injuries at Arden Park Dental. I must say that I am impressed and think this proposal is a great area to focus on.
First Impressions:
Your proposal has enough detail to inform an audience that may not know about Arden Park Dental and the dangers of needlestick. The problem outlined is compelling and the proposed solution is a feasible and applicable resolution. The qualifications and experience listed support your viability as a researcher exploring this topic
Organization
The organization of your proposal was well executed and flows nicely. Your proposal is nearly separated into distinct segments with each section’s title bolded which makes the document clear and allows the reader to clearly identify the components of the proposal.
Proposed Solution
The proposed solution is clearly stated and appropriately explained. Your solution was well thought out, giving enough information for readers to have a general understanding of the proposal. Since you only came up with one solution, I suggest that you discard the initial “One possible solution…” component from the first sentence and go directly into the proposed solution. As the first line is more specific, it will make your writing in this section more persuasive to the audience.
Scope
Your areas of inquiry are well-thought out and you have some important questions that will guide the reader through your report. In your introduction you mentioned how employees must follow strict protocols and guidelines, but you also have a question “Are employees wearing their personal protective equipment?”. This seems very contradictory.
Background Details of Readers
You provided a lot of information for who your proposal is intended for but it was a bit wordy and I think could be condensed. I would forgo details like how Tammy “has worked her way up to become office manager” and provide a more general conceptualization of the three people.
Methods
I think how you plan to conduct your research is very thorough as you will be able to obtain plenty of first hand information.
Qualifications
Your qualification level is above average and well related to your proposal theme. This will help back-up your statements in your final report. .
Concluding Comments
In short, your research proposal was nicely presented. Your qualifications were also very impressive and made it clear you will be more than capable of undertaking your proposed solution. I hope my suggestions are helpful and please do not hesitate to contact me if you have any questions.
Link to Formal Report Proposal here
Leave a Reply