Peer Review of Definition – Tonsillolith

Name of Reviewer: Joyce Wu
Author’s Name: Brenda Martinez
Title of the Expanded Definition: Assignment 1:3 Definitions – Tonsilloliths

Hi Brenda, 

I have reviewed your definition of Tonsilloliths posted on our team forum. Before reading your definition, I have limited knowledge of Tonsilloliths. I was merely guessing the meaning based on the prefix tonsillo- (tonsil) and the suffix -lith (stone). You did a great job defining the term by providing readers with scenario, visuals and questions that readers would be curious about. The following are some comments and suggestions I have for you to consider. 

Initial Impression: Very educational. I felt like I am reading one of those pamphlets from hospitals or clinics that talks about a medical condition. You have clearly indicated your purpose and reason for choosing this term in your introduction. 

Visuals: I really like the visuals you have included in your definition. I am not only talking about the figures, but also about the scenarios you have provided. While I was reading through the material, I was able to picture an imaginary patient having symptoms you described asking those questions. 

Audience: Due to the nature of the material, the targeted audience groups are patients and students in the healthcare related fields. 

Tone: The tone is professional but also friendly and caring. This is perfect for your targeted audience. 

Jargon: Most of the jargons and medical terms are accompanied with parenthetical definition. There is only one term that I had to look up: caries. 

Organization: The layout of the material is in a clear and logical order that includes an introduction, body, conclusion and references. Sections are labeled with subheadings, which made the material easy to read.  

Recommendation: 

1. Sentence structure/grammar in the Reading Situation section. For example, “It is determined that there is a history of seasonal allergies, and is experiencing post nasal drip.” Who is “it”?
2. The subheading for first paragraph in Expanded Definition section is a bit misleading.I would suggest incorporating the subheading in the paragraph. Here is my suggested edit:
   • Are tonsilloliths potential cause of bad breath? Patients often ask dental health care providers with questions about their oral health conditions and cause factors of halitosis (bad breath). Aside from the common and more obvious reasons, such as, poor oral hygiene, periodontal diseases, caries, and systemic health conditions, tonsilloliths (tonsil stones encrusted in the tonsillar crevices) are often a common condition that is overlooked. A patient could have impeccable oral hygiene and still suffer from tonsilloliths. I will further explain the condition and preventative measures of tonsilloliths.
3. Swapping order of figure 1 and figure 2. I think it is better to go from a broader view first then to a more detailed view for further clarification.

Overall Impression: The material may need some minor edits, but I think this is a great start. Thank you for introducing this term. I hope my suggestions are helpful to you. If you have any questions, feel free to contact me. I look forward to reading your next writing piece.