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Are you Emotionally Intelligent?

Drawing by Roy Blumenthal on Flickr

Some people may argue that emotional intelligence (EQ) is more important than one’s intelligence (IQ). In fact, psychologists generally agree that among the ingredients for success, IQ counts for roughly 10% (at best 25%); the rest depends on everything else — including EQ. EQ allows for people to read other’s physical or emotional signals and react to it appropriately. This is particularly important in the twentieth century, where being able to empathize, understand, negotiate with others and understanding yourself.

Your EQ is the level of your ability to understand other people, what motivates them and how to work cooperatively with them,” says Howard Gardner, the influential Harvard theorist.

Evidence has been shown that trait EQ predicts job performance and job satisfaction and other career success. Fear not, unlike IQ, EQ can be improved over time so long as one actively understands the basis of EQ.

Your EQ can be measured by 5 different categories: self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy and social skills.

1) Self-awareness is the ability of knowing what kind of emotion you are experiencing as it “happens,” it relies heavily on how you evaluate your emotions. Not only is it important to know your emotions, but knowing yourself; your self-worth and capabilities.

2) Self- Regulation is has a mutual partnership with self-awareness because once you’ve identified what emotions you are feeling, the next step is: how do you deal with the situation effectively? Emotionally intelligent people have the ability to alleviate emotions such as anger, anxiety or depression by looking at the brighter side of the situation, taking a long walk, meditation, praying…etc. Self-regulation involves being able to manage impulse disruptive emotions, maintaining standards of honesty and integrity, taking responsibility, being flexible of the situation and being innovative.

3) Motivation is driven by setting clear goals to negate disruptive emotions. Write your goals down on a piece of paper, make it visual and make a conscious effort to strive for change. Motivation consists of having determination, committing to your goals, and having a positive attitude despite obstacles and setbacks.

4) Empathy is the ability to understand how people feel. Being able to read the feelings behind someone’s signal will allow you to control your thought and feelings as well. An empathetic person is able to anticipate sense and recognize needs, they have political awareness – able to read a group’s emotional currents and power relationships, and most importantly, they understand what others need.

5) Social Skills are important in our society because it allows you to effectively negotiate, understand and empathize with others. Social skills focus on: effective persuasion, clear communication, leadership, initiating or managing change, resolving disagreements, nurturing relationships, being a team player, creating group synergy.

How emotionally/socially intelligent are you? Take a test:

http://kgajos.eecs.harvard.edu/mite/

– Cynthia Lung