Being able to communicate intellectually with a complex system known as language is what separates humans from all other animals on planet Earth. By sharing new ideas over time through language, humans have created advanced civilizations. Despite the myriad of languages spoken by different people, what we say is only a fraction of how we communicate. In fact, a person that only speaks Chinese can communicate with a person that only speaks English. How is this possible? It turns out communication encompasses more than just speech.
Whether you are having an animated conversation with your best friend or speaking to someone for the first time, much of what you say is communicated non-verbally. A study done by Albert Mehrabian indicates that the content of your message accounts for only 7% of total communication whereas majority lies in body language and tone of voice. So don’t think too hard about saying the “right” thing!
Animated conversation. Image via Google Images
Just how important is body language? According to a Kansas State University study:
Additionally, certain cultures such as Asians, are more perceptive towards body language and use non-verbal communication more often (on average) than other cultures. How you position yourself and what you do with your body can alter the energy and vibe you radiate to people. Body language experts from the American Management Association say that successful people in powerful positions such as management or CEO types, often assume certain body language traits without even knowing it. For example, if you are about to interview for a job and feeling a bit nervous, assume a power pose by expanding and opening your body up for confrontation for as little as two minutes and your levels of testosterone, the hormone responsible for power and dominance, will increase while cortisol, the hormone responsible for stress, will decrease. An excellent video on youtube presented by Amy Cuddy from TED includes more details on optimizing body language for success:
Okay, we get it. Non-verbal communication is important. But what about the way you’re speaking? It turns out both men and women are more likely to listen to someone that speaks slowly, clearly with a deeper tone of voice. Speaking with someone who takes the time to emphasize their points by articulating properly directly impacts your impression of them. When a person talks too fast, the conversation is not memorable because information cannot be processed. As the University of Texas puts it:
“Studies have suggested that it (speaking too fast) undermines our authority and causes others to perceive us as incompetent.“
There is also a difference in the speech patterns between men and women. Women tend to naturally end their sentences with uptalk which severely softens the authority and impact of their statement.
Interestingly, non-verbal communication is intuitive while language is learned. So watch what you say… Or more importantly, watch how you’re saying it.
Brian Wong
