Peer Review of Cynthia Li’s Definitions Assignment

TO: Cynthia Li, Undergraduate Student
FROM: Joanna Yu, Undergraduate Student
DATE: June 10, 2020
SUBJECT: Review of Definitions Assignment for ENGL 301 Module 1:3

Name of the Reviewer: Joanna Yu
Author’s Name: Cynthia Li
Title of the Expanded Definition: Catharsis

Your definitions assignment for the term “catharsis” has been reviewed. Thank you for the good work in formulating the parenthetical, sentence, and expanded definitions. The visual and references provided were also appropriate for this assignment. Below is the detailed review.

Initial Questions that Came to Mind:
1. In the History section of the expanded definition, what is “therapeutic purgation”?

2. In the History section of the expanded definition, what is “Poetics”?

3. In the History section of the expanded definition, what is “metaphysical”?

Initial Impressions
The definitions for catharsis are organized and was easily understood after reading it twice. The level of information in each definition is appropriate. However, there are a few ambiguities and technical terms in the definitions that require minor revisions. Please refer to the ‘Comments and Suggestions about Organization’ part for details.

Comments about Purpose
The introduction is clear and concise, which demonstrates understanding of the assignment’s purpose. The assignment is on topic and serves the intended purpose of defining “catharsis”. However, since a major component of this assignment is to write for a specific audience, providing an example of a situation or audience that requires the definitions of “catharsis” will satisfy one of the assignment’s criteria.

Comments about Audience
Due to the lack of exposure or previous knowledge about art, as your audience, the technical jargons used in the definitions sounded quite unfamiliar. A parenthetical definition may be used to clarify some of the technical terms.

Jargon
• The term “therapeutic purgation” in your expanded definition is not commonly used. Including a parenthetical definition or replacing it with a synonymous common term would improve reader understanding.
• The term “Poetics” can be inferred to a certain extent, but its definition is not obvious to non-technical readers.
• The term “metaphysical” in your expanded definition can be replaced with a more specific and less technical phrase.

Comments and Suggestions about Organization
Parenthetical Definition: The parenthetical definition is used effectively and contains an appropriate level of detail. In the first sentence, “Art” does not need to be capitalized. Additionally, the “,” after “purification” can be omitted.

Sentence Definition: The sentence definition contains an appropriate level of detail. However, you could improve this section by not capitalizing the words “Literary Term” in the first sentence. Additionally, omitting the word “too” in the second to the last sentence would make it read better because “also” is already used in the same line. Lastly, adding “while” after the word “art” in the last sentence would make your message more effective.

Expansion Strategies: Reading the expanded definition helps give the reader a clearer idea of what catharsis is.
• Separating the Visual and Example sections will improve the readers’ understanding of the term.
• Choice of visual provides an effective overview of how catharsis can be invoked.
• In the second sentence of the second paragraph, the word “affect” should be “effect”.
• The History section of the expanded definition was the paper’s weakest point because of the use of different jargons in the section which can leave the reader with more questions. Avoiding jargons would make the term clearer to the reader.

Overall Final Impressions
Overall, your definitions for “catharsis” are well organized and each definition contains an appropriate level of detail. The most effective element was the visual because it provided an easy to understand example of how “catharsis” can be invoked. Below are some overall suggestions to make the assignment more on point:
• Including an intended audience for the chosen term.
• Refraining from using jargons unfamiliar to the reader.
• Separating the specific strategies employed in the expansion section.

Hopefully, the recommendations will be helpful in editing this assignment. Please let me know if you have any questions regarding my feedback. Thank you.