To: Sydney Dunn,
From: Matthew De Rose
Subject: Web Application Package Peer Review
Dear Sydney,
Thank you for submitting your web application package! It was truly interesting to learn more about your professional background and experience. Below is a list of small recommendations that may help to present the strongest representation of your skills and knowledge to prospective employers.
Cover Letter
Introductory Paragraph
- Adding a statement about your enthusiasm for applying for the posted position will help strengthen a prospective employers bond to your application. Knowing which applicants felt that the job posting resonated with them as quickly as possible will help prospective employers quickly understand which applicants are genuinely interested in working for them
Body Paragraphs
- The information presented in the body paragraphs is relevant and matches the desired traits of successful applicants described in the job ad
- Since the second criteria of a successful applicant involves being creative and presenting creative ideas it may be beneficial to highlight this a bit more in your body paragraphs to ensure that prospective employers do not have an opportunity to misinterpret your creativity
Concluding Paragraph
- This concluding paragraph presents an enthusiastic professional which will conclude the prospective employers first impression strongly
Organization
- The cover letter is well organized, is of a reasonable length and has a clear flow of ideas
Spelling/Grammar
- There are not any glaring spelling or grammar mistakes that would tarnish the first impression being presented
Resume
Objective
- Describing your passion for the role described in the job will help to ensure that prospective employers clearly understand your interest in the role being filled
Organization
- It might be better to condense the resume into one page to ensure that the prospective employer can skim all information presented quickly. Also the abundance of white space should not be wasted if the resume is two pages.
- Using bullet points may help prospective employers to capture the key details of the knowledge and skills present. Since recruiters are notorious for spending only a few seconds with each resume it might be helpful to ensure that the best first impression of the skills presented can be made very quickly.
- Consider bringing the skills section up higher in the resume and list how long each skill has been developed to give prospective employers a quicker way to gauge the experience level being presented
Experience
- Presenting experience as actions instead of listing the duties performed in each position helps to present the experiences at each job in a more engaging manner. For example the Summer Programme Coordinator position at Summerland Museum and Archieves starts with “Was responsible for …” and it might be more eye-catching if it started as “Enthusiastically planned, organized, and directed weekly ….”
Reference Letters
Organization
- All three letters have clear logical flow of ideas which helps to ensure readers are engaged and read the letter right to the end
You Attitude
- Using the you-attitude to centre the reader in the request being made will help to best communicate how they can help. Throughout the reference letters “I” is used a lot. Try limiting the number of times I is used and opening the letters with a statement that centres the reader in this request for a reference.
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