Peer Review of Joanna’s Application Package Draft

TO: Joanna Yu, ENGL 301 Student

FROM: Zainab Rauf Tramboo, ENGL 301 Student, Reviewer

DATE: August 15^th, 2020

SUBJECT: Peer Review of Application Package

 

Dear Joanna,

 

I hope this review finds you in a good time to finish up this course’s final assignments. Thank you for submitting the draft application package for a Customer Experience Associate position at TD Bank. You have done a brilliant job of organizing the content of your document and communicating your valuable skills towards the position. Adding in some finishing touches to the documents would help to finalize this application package. Please consider the overall impressions and feedbacks mentioned below while working on the final draft of the application package.

 

First Impressions: The package is well written, easy to read, and to the point. Skills salient and relevant to the position are mentioned throughout the document. The reader can easily grasp the expertise and experience of the applicant.

 

Organization:

• Each document is presented on its own page and it is clear which one each is.
• Address, date, and contact information on the resume are present in the appropriate place however, adding the applicant’s name as the very first line above the address for the reference letters would allow the reader to know who the document is from at the first sight.
• Overall, a great job.

 

Content:

• Job Advertisement
  • Suitable posting selected. A great match to applicant considering past work experiences and the current stream of education.
  • MLA citation of the job description is present as per assignment requirements.

• Resume
  • Overall Organization – Consider spacing between subheadings and dates for an easier read. The resume is one page short, consider adding more content and subheading. Please re-check the guidelines for online resumes page 391 during revision.
  • Education
    • Education is well stated.
    • Mentioning specific courses taken that relate to the position being applied to will help boost the application.
  • Work Experience:
    • Work experiences listed are well formatted with proper dating and locations mentioned.
    • Short and accurate descriptions about things achieved, learned, and done in the description of each work experience will add value to the application.

• Personal:
  • Activities mentioned listed would be well formatted with proper locations mentioned, for example, Timesheet Console, UBC, Vancouver, BC.
  • Consider replacing the section heading as “Extra-Curricular Activities”, to make the application appear more formal
• Achievements:
  • Bold the subheading “Achievements” just like other subheadings to give a unified look to the document.

• • Missing Elements:
    • Skills
    • An in-depth but breif description of what tasks were performed, achievements achieved, or new things learned for each work experience.
    • Another page for the resume to fulfill the assignment requirement, considering adding hobbies, volunteering experiences, technical skills, languages.

 

• • Application Letter
    • Missing. Please consider writing one for the job application to fulfill the assignment requirement as well as give your application a boost.

• Please check the guidelines for cover letters on page 396.

• • Reference Letters
    • Reference letters are well organized. All required components are present and each paragraph addresses the key points to mention while seeking reference.
    • Appropriate people approached to for seeking references as their expertise shows relevance to the position applied
    • Consider including your written signature is encouraged to add personalization.
    • Letters are direct, concise, and both professional and friendly.
    • Great “thank you” statements that express gratefulness throughout the document.

Tone:

• The tone used in all documents for the application package is both friendly and professional.

• Writing with You attitude was followed throughout the documents.

 

Grammar:

There are some areas in which the grammar could be improved within this document.

• The resume consists of conflicting tenses. For example, under “Program Assistant” past tense is used (Tasked), whereas under “Timesheet Console” the description is listed in the present tense.

 

Concluding Comments: This was a brilliant start, providing more relative information with respect to work experience and education will help make the application more competitive. Below are a few general feedbacks and comments to be considered:

• Add cover letter
• Including written signatures to your reference letters
• Adjusting the spacing of the resume subheadings and go over the tenses used
• Adding more details to the resume to fulfill the two-page resume requirement

I hope the suggestions are helpful in completing the assignment. Please let me know if you have any questions or comments.

Thank you.

301 Joanna Yu Job Post

301 Joanna Yu Reference Requests

301 Joanna Yu resume