Tag Archives: isabel ferreras

Gossip Sunday: Too Many Memes

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Lazy Sunday.  We’ve been called a gossip rag enough times that we may as well act like it.

Anyone sick of tsk-tsking the AUS for innumerable (okay, three) candidate mis-steps yet?  We’re watching you, Mary Leong and Michael Haack, but HOLY JESUS Ryan “Not Too Fine to Fine” Trasolini, read the manual, son.  Additionally, rumor & our inbox have it that one of the Presidential candidates has started offering cash money for VFM coverage. But of course, we’re all way too srs jrnalism bsns to take that deal, amirite?

Friday night also saw the kickoff of UBC Votes events, beginning with a well-attended concert at the Pit. Your Confidentialites were too busy being anonymous/sucking face to pay much attention, but luckily AUS Voting Committee Superstar Taylor L. brought along her camera.  Hence, we’ve got these for you:

First, AUS presidential candidate Mike Silley.

imminent warning: lacks logo, date, time, approval

AMS Elections EA & CRO, also Second-Cutest Couple [#barf]

cause : effect

But by far the highlight of these photos was our first opportunity to cry APPARENT SLATE

quick, while he's facing away

CANOODLIN’!!1!!!11! OUT. RAGEOUS.

Hack vs. Hack

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Oh goodness, y’all.

In a grandiose lesson about knocking on wood, not counting chickens before eggs are hatched, ETCETERA, in tonight’s council meeting our illustrious EA Isabel informed the group that the heretofore scandal-free AMS elections were, in fact, scandalicious.

Ladies and gentlemen: it appears we got hacked.

like, it was way rad

For big fat details in all their glory, you can read the full text of the Elections Fraud Report.  A quick summary follows, however, for you kids on the go.

  1. Mark Latham, Voter Funded Media guru, was analyzing data for his own purposes & discovered an apparent irregularity; he notified Isabel, who alerted the proper authorities.
  2. There are 731 “Suspect Votes” which were identified as being from the same IP address & voting in a four-hour bloc (a very large number of votes in a very short amount of time).
  3. An independent party, Forensic Data Recovery (FDR), has been hired to investigate this occurrence and see if their are other instances of voter fraud in the elections.
  4. These 731 votes affect ONLY the following races:
  • the single passing referendum (tuition policy = LOWER PLZ)
  • UBC Senate
  • VFM
  • OH FUCK WHAT

It’s still uncertain how the suspicious activity happened, whether or not saved votes were overwritten or the fraudulent votes were independent, etc. etc.  Is it possible that previous races were affected? oh yes.  Is it possible that there is undetectable fraud happening in our elections? Well, in the words of Speaker Dave:

We said they were a hacker. We didn’t say they were a super-smart hacker.

Sleep soundly, voters.  Oh, and the UBC Votes team (AUS, EUS, HKUS, & SUS) will not be using this online voting system, they will use WebVote. And you, O Computer Elite of the Cloning Powers, we have but one request for you:

OH GOD PLEASE it's been such a slow month

Irregular indeed.

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Last week, Nearly-Former Elections Administrator Isabel Ferreras sent out a Media Advisory letting us all know the following:

The Alma Mater Society of UBC Vancouver (AMS), UBC’s student union, has discovered voting irregularities in its January 2010 elections and referenda. The AMS is taking this issue very seriously and is taking the necessary measures to deal with this matter. An independent auditor has been hired to conduct a thorough investigation. The AMS will be unable to release any further information until the investigation is complete. The AMS’ primary concern is in serving students. As such, the organization will operate business as usual.


Council tonight will address this issue, and presumably key parties will learn what, exactly, the fuck is up.  Meantime, however, you and I and everyone else not privy to this info (which is, it seems a good 90% of hacks) are left wondering what exactly a voting irregularity is.  Because, to me, it sounds like this:

that looks painful.

(See, because the elections were supposed to have been passed, but apparently something wrong went into the system? and now things are all backed up? and we have to seek independent help for this blockag—oh, fuck it.)

YEAHHHH POOP JOKES YEEAAAAAHHHHHH

Way to go, UBC <3

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The polls are now closed! While the fun part isn’t here yet (Gallery, 6pm, Results!) we are sure breathing a sigh of relief.

AMS Confidential is so proud of all you hacks practicing safe sex campaigning so hard and barely violating any rules! Way to play nice. While there certainly wasn’t enormous scandal, we enjoyed making you all glittery.

These editors are also proud of our kickass Elections Guru who played it calm, tweeted up a storm, and threw a solid bzzr garden (on a Sunday night, no less). HOWEVER, last we heard the voter turnout was at 6923, which is 15% !!! (Update: we just did the math! Thanks Do Me Now Duncan) We surpassed last years turnout going against a predicted voter apathy. UN-what?

Way to go, Elections Guru. For this, we deem you a sexy as hell dreamboat <3 Also, loads of love to The Boyfriend (aka Chief Returning Officer), Mark, and Will from VFM!!

So hawt.

Gerald Deo Photo

scan-da-lous!

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All I was trying to do is to question the instinct to characterize almost anything that happens in relation to elections as “hot”, [BREAKING] news without any verification or reflection.
-Issues That Matter

On a relatively slow media day yesterday – as in, no Bijan ballerina videos – it seems that other VFM outlets and The Media are  creating some drahmaz almost as sexy as Lindsay Lohan in Mean Girls. If you’re the type who fancies a classy lay like ourselves, you can always vote for us. Here’s a quick breakdown of yesterday’s stir. Warning: clicking the links may cause you to transport back in time to high school.


Elections Guru vs The Editors

Miss Elections Guru and The Editors over at The Media have been in a bit of an awkward turtle. The Ubyssey wrote an adorable editorial about the Elections Guru, in which she then responded with a professional slap back. BOOYAH, bitches.

Chairman Naylor vs The Boyfriend

Our beloved Chairman Naylor (bowing on bended knee as I type) wrote epic Naylorisms about electoral code and blah blah blah. Then, he apparently had a comment glitch, in which The Boyfriend of Elections Guru posted a long meandering rebuttal. Since comments were not working, he made a Facebook note and tagged various hacks and The Media to get his sexy point across and swoon his beloved lady. Chairman Naylor then responded again. Meow.

Issues That Matter vs Emails That Matter vs Foxy Trout

A Mr. Callow emailed Emails That Matter, Foxy Trout, and the Sex Goddesses about a “hot tip” which was published here and here (we’re lovers of abstinence, personally). The following catfight occurred:

Issues That Matter: Bitches, we heard that long ago.
Kommander Keg: OH SNAP, biatch!
Probable editor of Emails That Matter under a secret name: Good job.
Foxy Trout: Issues That Matter, get your nose out of your ass. You’re just jealous we got the tip, you didn’t report it yo.
Issues That Matter: Here is a long list of things proving that I am correct. You yourself even reported this accidentally. Emails aren’t important, Issues are what really Matters. And Foxy Trout, it is on our page. #journalisticwin

And there you have it kids. Stay tuned for when the CANDIDATES start making waves, sheesh. We’re hoping for a John Edwards mixed with Jamie Lynn scenario, personally.

Umbrella, anyone?

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smaller than this one, though.

Elections shitstorm’s a-brewin’, kids.

Apparently the folks at the Ubyssey took it upon themselves to ask a few key politicos (*cough*El Bahmadian*cough*) a few key questions during last week’s All Candidates Meeting—standard reporting procedure, one might think.

Except certain elections officials are interpreting this as possible campaigning—strictly verboten until the 18th—and have, hence, forbidden publication of the question and its answer.

Gosh, I wonder if newspaper folk (who are already on edge after months of Blake-Frederick-enacted poor communications) would take offense at that kind of ultimatum?

The totally tragic part is that Newspaper News (Sam Jung) + Elections (Isabel Ferreras) are, like, super-close.  Way close.  Close in ways we can’t even tell you (but which aren’t what you’re thinking now, perv-o.)

"Hand check" close. (Gerald Deo photo)

I’m trying to think of a reality TV parallel to this, but all I’ve got is, like, Kim & that crazy girl on some old season of ANTM.  Thoughts?

ACM: Beers before Recaps

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All Candidates Meeting! what exciting times.  Isabel (Ferreras, Chief Elections Officer) ran things with incredible speed and efficiency, so even heavily venerated hacks are having trouble compiling complete lists.  Will Davis, Swarthy VFM Dude, tells us there’ll be an official list out soon, so, uh… this particular tipsy reporter will wait for that.

(What? It’s Friday. I HAVE NEEDS.)

In the meantime, have some fun quotes from our delicious delicious elections comm:

Ricardo (CRO): I don’t want you guys to have my phone number.  Most of you guys are creeps.

Isabel: Jell-O wrestling, I don’t know a lot about, but maybe Ricardo can fill you in.  …  It’s not obligatory.

Oh, yes.  There will be Jell-O.  And, in the near future, an explanation for this:

Oh, hey, that looks like a fun time.