Tag Archives: spencer rasmussen

Here’s 1600 words Justin wrote about Senate.

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Most days, we wake up to an inbox full of love and the occasional piece of knock-off Viagra spam [Ed note: On the other hand, our dick-sucking has lacked a certain zest lately]. But a few days ago, we received this magical screed. It’s written by esteemed former Ubyssey editor and Actual Real-Live Journalist Justin McElroy, who’s won a lot of awards—and a lot of hearts—for being superlatively great. He suggested we add some sparkly gifs (actual quote: “The Hunger Games are big with the youths these days, right?”), but we thought it was great as is. Laziness played no part in this decision.

If four years of covering UBC on a daily basis taught me anything, it’s that talking about student politician elections should be done with a heavy grain of skepticism. Every year, the same crop of eager young ones come forward with vague slogans, impossible goals and more guts than brains.

Not only that, but once upon a time AMS Elections were about (cue West Wing inspirational music) big issues. Big issues, with candidates on all sides of the political spectrum arguing for what they believe in. Who got elected really mattered, and while giant clusterfucks might happen, they were about tuition or student activism or something else which galvanized students to care.

The past two years, student political culture has turned soft, mushy, and predictable, with people afraid of trying anything or criticizing anyone. I don’t know if that has made things better or worse…but it’s certainly made things less exciting.

However, you have to choose the Leaders of Tomorrow—and I’m here to help. That, and take advantage of the fact that no longer running The Ubyssey means I can dispense with an insincere veneer of optimism, and rant like the curmudgeon I am.

But I’m here to mostly help! Plus, The Editor of this blog puts up with me drinking, yelling, and laughing with her roommate in the middle of the night, interrupting her sleep, so there’s that. [Ed note: Our walls are made of paper and spackled with my sleep-deprived tears. More after the jump.]

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Unobtanium Jello Wrestling!

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Well, the event you were all waiting for has come and gone. No, not The Presidential Debate hosted by Issues That Matter and The Media. Instead, The Unobtanium Jello Wrestling event. Held as a part of Science Week, it conveniently falls during elections and, as such, has become a joyous platform for candidates to campaign upon. In many cases, it is also the determining factor for many students yet to cast their ballot. While the non-hack and non-SUS crowd was meager at best, there were some epic battles.
For all you Noobs out there, the objective of jello wrestling is to remove the sock of your opponent in an inflatable bowl/pool of…green jello.  Needless to say, judicious use of tarps (and athletic garb) are involved.
After the cut, more of this:

god, we wish.

PLUS our exclusive live-action Sean v. Joel EngNerd Death Match—and how this year’s candidates compare to those of years gone by.

Sparkle Happy Endorsements 2010

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Is it that time of the year already?? Oh, how the initial campaign period has flown. They’ve impressed us on the fields! They’ve impressed us in the debates! They’ve left numerous messages in our inbox! But now it’s time to separate the cream from the chaff and give you our top picks (not entire Condorcet rankings, we’re not total wonks) for this year’s round of AMS Elections. Get ready, after the jump, for this year’s


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Aaaand they’re off.

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Day one after the announcement of candidates, and rumor has it

(and by ‘rumor’ I mean verifiable evidence plus the natural supposition that of course elections officials are in Panic Epic Work Mode at the moment)

that Chief Elections Officer & CEO of Our Hearts Isabel Ferreras has spent her morning off and on the phone to her staff.  Certainly we’ve already seen three—three!—BoG candidates drop out.  Goodbye, Peter Stein, AJ Hajir Hajian, and Nader Beyzaei—we hardly knew ye.

We’ve got the complete list for you after the break, but first, let’s take a little walk down quelle scandale potentiale lane, y’all.

The buzz at beer last night and brunch this morning was triplefold—quadruple if you count the cheap Gallery pitchers—but it boils down to this:

  1. Blake Frederick.  It’s been too easy lately to forget that our BF came into office as something of a golden boy, hailed by supporters and detractors alike both for his passionate commitment and political credentials.

    Happier times.  (Photo: Gerald Deo)

    And despite—or perhaps because of—the shitshow that’s marked his end of term, Frederick hasn’t given up the political life.  He’s thrown his hat into, in fact, three races—not only the usual Senate/BoG pairing, but also the Ubyssey’s Board of Directors.  This last is interesting considering that Frederick & our beloved campus publication are not what you’d call the best of friends.  There have been scathing editorials all round and a rather sudden crackdown on AMS communications policy getting in the way of good relations.  With all that history, one wonders what the Ubyssey Board could look like at this time next year—assuming, of course, that Frederick doesn’t disqualify himself by winning another race.

  2. The positions of interest. Although it’s not unusual to see BoG, Senate, and VP External attract a few more competitors than other positions, this year’s International Student Rep hopefuls are almost frighteningly numerous.  You guys know this position is non-voting, right?  (And Star, you know you submitted all materials without a last name, right? you do know? and it’s a thing? oh. cool.)  It’s also heartening to see two relative unknowns rounding out the Presidential nominees, although it makes hunting for pictures a heckuva lot harder.  Don’t even ask me about typing the tags up for this post.  RIDICULOUS.

    YOU SEE HOW I SUFFER FOR YOU

  3. The Elections Committee’s (presumed) accountability screed. One of the new features this year will be a PENALTY BOX on the Elections official website.  Isabel Ferreras is a formidable woman, as seen here:

    cower, puny candidates!! leg-biting will be penalized!

    and we have no doubt that she won’t hesitate to use this box, which purpose is to daily—publicly!—keep the voting public very aware of any and all “warnings, violations, infractions and penalties.” It’s a move we here at Fuzzy Kitten Unicorn Scandal are looking forward to a little too much, frankly.

BUT WHO ELSE is out there? here are the people we’ll be stalking bothering in the name of Fair Game Media Coverage for the next month:

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