Monthly Archives: December 2012

Stress.

As university students, we all experience stress in some way. Sometimes it is ignorable, sometimes it is  totally manageable, and at times it can feel utterly debilitating. Time management and relaxation strategies can work wonders with the first two scenarios, but for the last one, sometimes they just don’t cut it.

When I get this “intense stress” as I will call it, it feels like no matter how I organize myself, there are just not enough hours in the day to do everything I have to do. Because I have so. Much. Stuff. To. Do.  There is just so much I need to accomplish it’s overwhelming and I seriously doubt my ability to do it. And taking time for myself, meditating, exercising, and “relaxing” activities can’t take my brain off of everything I should be doing at that moment and worrying I won’t be able to do it all and that I won’t be able to do it well enough.

When I get intense stress, I tend to:

  1.  Tell myself I can handle it and micromanage my time; this often involves not giving myself enough time to relax and have fun, and also staying up later and getting up earlier to try to cram more stuff in a day. Less sleep and less brain-off time is the perfect breeding ground for intense stress.
  2. Focus poorly. When my brain is in ten million places at once, I can’t focus properly on the task at hand.
  3. Get frustrated. I can’t focus, and I’m running on a fried brain.  Do you think I’m getting good results from my labor? No.
  4. Push harder. I’m frustrated with my lack of progress, so I push myself harder to try to get them. Hello even more tired brain.  I tell myself I should stop (this usually goes for practicing for me), but I haven’t accomplished what I wanted to yet so I keep saying “Just a little longer” for what turns into a lot longer, resulting in even less progress and possibly injury (in the case of my hands).
  5. Cry. I break. I lie on the floor for a while.  I question my abilities and also the fairness of the universe.
  6. Check in with reality. Okay, clearly what I’m doing is not working, made obvious by my breakdown. I need to take a break. I need to breathe. I need to remember that even in the worst case scenario, I will still be alive, and there will still be people who love me. And those, above all, are the most important things. What I have to do isn’t going to be easy; it might not be fun.  But there is a pretty good chance things are going to be okay.  However, letting your stress possess you isn’t the way to get there.

What am I going to do now? Well, honestly, I’m not sure. I’m going to take it a day at a time. I’m going to take more me time, sleep more, not pack my days so full. Not get mad at myself if things don’t go the way I want. I’m going to do my best, and if it isn’t good enough, well. I’m just going to try to get through this degree, and then live my life at a pace I like.

Also I’m maybe going to look into stress management classes.

 

Leave a Comment

Filed under Wellness

“I Don’t Belong Here” Syndrome

Diagnosis: “I Don’t Belong Here” Syndrome

Symptoms: Feelings of low self-esteem and confidence, worthlessness, anxiety, stress, depression, doubt. Wondering if one really has what it takes to be a UBC student.

Unfortunately, it is all too common this time of year for students to develop “I Don’t Belong Here” Syndrome.  With finals looming, you look at your midterm marks which maybe as high as you were hoping, and if you’re in first year, probably not as high as your high school marks, and you wonder if you’re really smart enough to be at UBC.  Your previous marks disappointed you, and your brain is tired now and you wonder if you can muster the strength to finish that final 100 metre stretch of the race.

It happens to me too.  Since I can’t practice much because of my hands, the pieces I’m working on aren’t in the kind of shape I’d like them to be in, and all of my peers seem to be miles ahead of me. In my harp quartet jury (like a test-performance which you get graded on), I didn’t perform nearly as well as I wanted to, and I started getting in a funk.  Throughout the year, I feel less than confident about my abilities, and although my teacher frequently tells me that I’m doing well and that I’m talented, I can’t help but feel like I’m just not good enough.

But the truth is, I’m doing fine. I’m just psyching myself out. And if the above symptoms sound like you, that’s what you’re doing too.  If I was no good at harp, I wouldn’t have been admitted.  Everyone who gets into UBC is smart.  So if you were smart enough to get in, you’re smart enough to stay in.

Your courses are designed to be challenging and push you to your limits.  If you feel like you need help, that’s nothing to be ashamed of; that’s why UBC has tons of academic resources for you to take advantage of.

You do belong here! Try not to get discouraged. UBC chose you, after all, and they weren’t wrong about i!

 

4 Comments

Filed under Academics, Wellness