Author Archives: taylorloren

About taylorloren

exposing the down & dirty of UBC politics.

News for Noobs

We here at Sexy R Us Confidential have been looking for a third editor to spice things up, give us neck rubs when needed, and lighten our loads a bit so we don’t fail out of university.

We’re pleased to announce a VFM marriage of sorts, with the addition of our new editor, AMS Gossip Guy himself.

GG will post more on himself at a later date.

Hillson, we still love you.

On to some sad, sad news.

Unfortunately, glitter extremist and twittebrity Taylor will be leaving Confidential until constituency elections are over. She has joined forces with Chairman Naylor as part of the AUS Elections Committee and wicked awesome ubcvotes.ca team…it’s pretty hard to compete with that sexy Chairman, especially now with his dashing new smile. Oh, and his deep pockets.

Now on to some happy, happy news.

VFM IS BACK! Or, so says this tweet. We’re stoked to have you all voting for us again & again & again and promise to bring you some delicious content on everything scandalous in AUS, EUS, HKUS, and SUS elections!! Check our events page for all the events and remember to follow our Twitter.

The Life & Times of AMS Gossip Guy

UPDATE: We just chatted online with GG, and he says that he has been the original all along, and used his Kiwi friend’s name for the VFM form, to cash any cheques. Sneaky sneaky, that one.

Last year on your AMS Elections ballot, you could have voted for AMS Gossip Guy.

This year, he faded into oblivion without any clandestine affairs, tweets, or posts; save for a random one come the UN invasion. Why did Gossip Guy leave us hanging without any scintillating material?

Because, our dear friends, he had left the country.

We wish that it was some hot steamy affair with an executive (insert the need for Fan Fiction here), or even a fellow AMS alias (Eden Hart, anyone?), but alas, we haven’t uncovered any truth to these ponderings.

We have, however, uncovered something else.

HIS IDENTITY.

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Bye Bye International Seat…

Oh, International Seat…so last month’s Disabilities Seat. If you want some point vs point action that sort of hurts your brain, check out the epic battle of Timkachu vs. Chairman Naylor on Issues That Matter here.

At Council on Wednesday, the Legislative Procedures Committee (Leprecomm LPC) headed by our very Chairman Naylor brought the issue of abolishing the International Students seat (which is non-voting) to Council’s oval table. They argued that the ISA seat was not in the best interest of the group it represents, and that the structure of the AMS is not amenable to such a seat. Basically, in the AMS we have representation by population, so having a seat tailored to the interests of international students allows for double representation, which is an LPC no-no.

Representation by population is something that is important to preserve as it is allowing each member a representative on council through a direct channel and empowers people to get elected through those channels. –Chairman Naylor

Saayy whaaaat? Federalism?

Basically:

  • As a student, you belong to a faculty. Be this Arts, Engineering, Science, or Human Kinetics to name a few (oh hai, they happen to be having their own elections and Arts/HK nomination forms are due Tuesday. http://ubcvotes.ca for more info! *shameless democracy plug*).
  • Within your faculty, you have an undergraduate society which holds elections to elect your own sexy executive and other positions, including AMS reps.
  • The AMS has reps based on how many students are in that faculty. Proportional representation, anyone? If you’re in Arts, you get 5 reps. Science, 4. & on and on and on…so that every student has the same amount of representation on Council, and the same chance of getting elected to Council.

The whole point in this is that someone represents you based on your faculty and that everyone is equal, and it is NOT based on whether you’re an international student, a student with disabilities, a gay student, a commuter student, etc.

Tahara encompassed the above in a moving speech, except she threw in an “anglo-saxon seat” example which got these editors daydreaming…

JJ is running for SUS Director of Finance...but we'd kind of like this instead.

Anyway, a lot of sexy debate resumed. And we mean a LOT. Let us also note that Brittany Perna was just recently elected to the seat, and this was her first real council meeting…such a nice welcome! Here are some of this editor’s favourite bitch slap quotes.

Tim: There’s been no consultation with International Students.
El Naylorino: Tim, it’s quite clear you don’t care about consultation. #OHSNAP

Naz, Former Int’l Rep: If I am gay, I am gay everywhere. If I go back to Iran, I am not an international student.

There were also some nice quotes:

The only divides we should see at this table are the arbitrary ones between faculties. –New VPX Jeremy

We should work holistically with I-House. – Iggy (up for re-election!)

So then it came time to vote, and it was breathtakingly close. 2/3 was needed, and it got EXACTLY 2/3. Perhaps the lesson learned from this debate is that if you want to push your controversial cause through council, seeking political advice—and impassioned speech-making—from Timkachu is a guaranteed way to make it fail.

Remember kids, as Chairman Naylor bravely expressed, High School Musical stylewe’re all in this together. Love each other, and love those international/domestic kids…they’re a big source of sex appeal/revenue for the university <3

Disclaimer of sorts? Kai is an international student, and Taylor is a domestic student. EQUALLY FUNDED VOTER FUNDED MEDIA WHAT WHAT.

Freeesssshhh Meeeeatt

Last night’s AMS Council meeting was full of some fresh hacktastic meat. Those newly elected to hackville are presented to you, along with the others who are in some spankin new positions. We’re looking forward to fun filled year with the new exec and their new nicknames/alter egos…and we’re taking this opportunity to plug the AMS Annual General Meeting, where you can meet them all too! and get fed. Here are some of our doodles from the meeting and your new hacks:

Ben “The Situation” Cappellacci

Fist pump? Check. Fake tan? Check. Ripped abs, oh hell yeah. Will this new hack be Snookin for Love in the AMS? Only time will tell.

Ekat “Smiley Miley” 

If you read her interview with Emails That Matter, you’d know that she chose “Party in the USA” for her campaign song for the best reasons ever..

I think the song that best represents my campaign is the musically post-modernistic piece Party in the USA (replace USA by AMS) by Miley because it artistically embodies my internal struggle with finding myself in an entirely new situation.

If elected, Ekat promised to sing us all Party in the AMS….and we’re holding her to it. Come to Hack Karaoke in the Gallery this Tuesday!

Elin “El Suave” Tayyar

Showed up late, didn’t bring his laptop.  Did bring his campaign manager.  Iiiiiinterestinnnnng.

Okay, so honestly, all we really know about Elin is that he looks good and wears that dang scarf everywhere.  Significance? Affectation?  Hideous neck disfigurement?  TELL US, ELIN.  WE’RE DYING TO KNOW.  Until we have a better reason, we’ll just dub it Man Fashion.  And we’ll dub you…

Jeremy “The Crooner” McElroy

It’s a well-known fact that McElroy bears an uncanny physical resemblance to former N’Sync-er Joey Fatone, but since taking office, he’s followed in Fatone’s privacy-seeking footsteps.  JMac has removed all those lovely facebook pictures of RBF events (& RBF hijinks!) since he began his campaign—no doubt, like Fatone, trying to distance himself from his past.  Of course, Fatone went from boy bands to Broadway, and McElroy’s gone,well, from AMS to AMS.  But you see our point.  And, luckily, because we have Sources, you see this uncanny resemblance too:

We can only pray this will, somehow, be recreated.

A few less well-established hacks made their first appearances, too:

Brittany “Save the Cheerleader, Save the …” Perna, was there prepping for her new job as International Rep.  As a former blond, I’ve gotta say, I’m kind of rooting for Miss Perna here.  She’s said that she’s intimidated to take part in Council—and who can blame her, really?  Our girl was serious in lace (wait, did that make sense?), even though she had to be seated on the periphery last night.  She seemed pretty into the presentation on international engagement, too (which would make her the only one).

Dylan Callow, new CUS rep (well, almost new—he hasn’t signed the paperwork yet, apparently—and how totally like a CUS kid to draw that line) was there for his first big official meeting.  He is a bunny rabbit, and we want to pinch his cheeks.

The only hilarious soundbite of the meeting was the presentation by Colin, head of the Society Act Review Subcommittee … also known as SARS.

Stay tuned for more Council fun as there is another meeting next week to make up for the extended reading week. Hearts and unicorns!

Way to go, UBC <3

The polls are now closed! While the fun part isn’t here yet (Gallery, 6pm, Results!) we are sure breathing a sigh of relief.

AMS Confidential is so proud of all you hacks practicing safe sex campaigning so hard and barely violating any rules! Way to play nice. While there certainly wasn’t enormous scandal, we enjoyed making you all glittery.

These editors are also proud of our kickass Elections Guru who played it calm, tweeted up a storm, and threw a solid bzzr garden (on a Sunday night, no less). HOWEVER, last we heard the voter turnout was at 6923, which is 15% !!! (Update: we just did the math! Thanks Do Me Now Duncan) We surpassed last years turnout going against a predicted voter apathy. UN-what?

Way to go, Elections Guru. For this, we deem you a sexy as hell dreamboat <3 Also, loads of love to The Boyfriend (aka Chief Returning Officer), Mark, and Will from VFM!!

So hawt.

Gerald Deo Photo

3 hours!!!

There’s only THREE hours left of voting. Get your vote on, be sexy, and cast that freaking ballot! It’s super easy and everything you need to know is right HERE. So far, 5634 have voted, let’s get another 1000 before 4pm!

Tonight, Gallery at 6pm for the final elimination round results! See you there for copious amounts of beer and hackery.

MIGHTY MORPHIN AMS EXECUTIVE

Also, I know you all think we’re supa kawaii, so don’t forget to vote for us on your ballot and………here in Continuous VFM! We’re at 26% right now, amazing and love love love.

You listen to Paris.

Unobtanium Jello Wrestling!

Well, the event you were all waiting for has come and gone. No, not The Presidential Debate hosted by Issues That Matter and The Media. Instead, The Unobtanium Jello Wrestling event. Held as a part of Science Week, it conveniently falls during elections and, as such, has become a joyous platform for candidates to campaign upon. In many cases, it is also the determining factor for many students yet to cast their ballot. While the non-hack and non-SUS crowd was meager at best, there were some epic battles.
For all you Noobs out there, the objective of jello wrestling is to remove the sock of your opponent in an inflatable bowl/pool of…green jello.  Needless to say, judicious use of tarps (and athletic garb) are involved.
After the cut, more of this:

god, we wish.

PLUS our exclusive live-action Sean v. Joel EngNerd Death Match—and how this year’s candidates compare to those of years gone by.

Voting for Dummies

Oh, readers. The things we do for you. I am still hungover from last night’s epic hackfest bzzr garden, and I am trying to understand math. I haven’t voted yet, and was confused on how, exactly, voting worked. Over here at Confidential, we used our cute little smiles to coerce our special analyst into helping our cute little brains.

Confused on voting? Keep reading after the jump for how it works.

Want the News for Noobs version? Here is how to vote.

  1. Research ahead of time (these are the candidatesthis is who we want to win, and this is the referendum breakdown)
  2. You are allowed 15 minutes to vote. However, you can save your progress and come back later, with 15 minutes allotted each time you sign back in.
  3. Go here anytime between NOW and January 29
  4. Tell your friends to vote! DO IT! <3

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Sparkle Happy Endorsements 2010

Is it that time of the year already?? Oh, how the initial campaign period has flown. They’ve impressed us on the fields! They’ve impressed us in the debates! They’ve left numerous messages in our inbox! But now it’s time to separate the cream from the chaff and give you our top picks (not entire Condorcet rankings, we’re not total wonks) for this year’s round of AMS Elections. Get ready, after the jump, for this year’s


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