Today was my third rehearsal with the symphony orchestra, and I can tell you now, it’s way better than before.
I felt a bit lost at the first rehearsal (all right, entirely lost), but at this point I can come in when I’m supposed to, hit the notes I’m supposed to and play out without fear (well, mostly anyway). At the first rehearsal I was literally shaking with nervousness and thought my heart was going to burst out of my ears. But I had way more fun today and feel a lot better about myself. I feel that I am a valuable contributing member of the ensemble. My first rehearsal was – well, it was my first rehearsal. I had never done it before, so of COURSE it didn’t go perfectly. At the time I was very upset, but I have a tendency to be very hard on myself, and now I can see that everything is working out just fine.
I suppose that I’ve learned from this experience that a “failure” is not a permanent failure, it is merely an obstacle to overcome, a challenge to keep working away at. With time and more experience, it will get better and you will improve.