Tag Archives: rehearsal

Failure is just a challenge to overcome

Today was my third rehearsal with the symphony orchestra, and I can tell you now, it’s way better than before.

I felt a bit lost at the first rehearsal (all right, entirely lost), but at this point I can come in when I’m supposed to, hit the notes I’m supposed to and play out without fear (well, mostly anyway). At the first rehearsal I was literally shaking with nervousness and thought my heart was going to burst out of my ears.  But I had way more fun today and feel a lot better about myself.  I feel that I am a valuable contributing member of the ensemble.  My first rehearsal was – well, it was my first rehearsal.  I had never done it before, so of COURSE it didn’t go perfectly.  At the time I was very upset, but I have a tendency to be very hard on myself, and now I can see that everything is working out just fine.

I suppose that I’ve learned from this experience that a “failure” is not a permanent failure, it is merely an obstacle to overcome, a challenge to keep working away at.  With time and more experience, it will get better and you will improve.

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Filed under Academics, School of Music

Failure is a stinging slap in the face

Today was my first ever orchestra rehearsal.  I have played harp in a large ensemble before today; I started playing too late in high school to ever in be in the Winnipeg Youth Orchestra.

So naturally, I was nervous.  Very nervous.  After all, I’m a total newbie playing with people who are practically professionals, at least compared to me. I could feel my heart rate increase dramatically as the conductor stepped onto his podium, and the rehearsal went downhill from there.

I missed nearly all my entrances. I lost count countless times.  I’ve only had the part for two weeks, and since my hands are still a little injured I can only practice so much every day, and in trying to prepare my solo pieces as well, the orchestra part I got wasn’t quite learned for today.  Mostly, but not quite.  Well, it turns out that all the parts I can do really well are buried under mountains of double bass and brass, while the parts I’m not sure about are pretty much solos.  And all of them I screwed up today.

*head desk*

I felt so awful.  Embarrassed.  Ashamed. I should be better than this!

I know, I know.  There’s still an entire month til the performance (which is at 8 pm in the Chan on March 31, if anyone wants to come), and I’ll have it learned by then. I hope.  It was my first rehearsal ever, it’s okay, yadda yadda…

I just feel like I let myself down.  And that is much worse than anyone else.


Filed under Academics, School of Music