Category Archives: memory

A Girl Returned: Mothers, Sisters, Strawberries

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Donatella Di Pietrantonio’s A Girl Returned (2017) reminded me of a host of similar novels, though it also has much that is original and striking of its own. Its opening scene, for instance, has echoes (deliberate or otherwise) with the way that Carmen Laforet’s Spanish classic, Nada (1945), begins. In both, we see an adolescent girl struggling up steps with a loaded suitcase to an unfamiliar apartment where (for reasons that are not fully explained) she will spend the next year or so with relatives she has never previously met, who strike her, at first at least, as hostile and even monstrous. In both cases, the host family is impoverished, and there is much emphasis on food (or its lack). But there are also strange psychological tensions and a disturbing erotic undercurrent, especially around a strong-willed older male figure who never quite fits his environment and then dramatically dies–in Laforet’s novel, at the tale’s conclusion; in Di Pietrantonio’s, more like halfway through. The protagonist is only able to negotiate all these difficulties as she becomes friends with a female figure of about the same age, who teaches her lessons in resilience and resistance.

The twist in A Girl Returned is that the family to whose strange ways the unnamed narrator has to adapt is in fact her own birth family. (In Nada, the equivalent household is packed instead with uncles and aunts.) For it turns out that she has been living with, and formally or informally adopted by, an aunt or uncle. But when the story opens, she has been forced out of that arrangement (because, she believes, her adoptive mother is ill, perhaps terminally) and is returned to a set of biological parents and siblings that she has never known. Moreover, in a test of in the influence of nurture versus nature, her aunt and uncle had raised her in a life of relative privilege, of urban sophistication, ballet lessons, and beach clubs by the sea. Her “real” family, by contrast, live hand to mouth in a much smaller town, speak dialect rather than standard Italian, are crowded in a single bedroom with only a flimsy partition to separate the young from the adult, and the children drop out of school early as they are expected to help in the constant effort to put food on the table.

If Carmen Laforet is a possible forbear for Di Pietrantonio, it is also impossible to ignore the shadow of Elena Ferrante’s Neapolitan Quartet (likewise translated by Ann Goldstein), whose female narrator similarly looks back on a youth marked by economic hardship, with scholastic success the apparent key to social mobility. But if Ferrante’s novels revolve around a “brilliant friend” (“amica genial”), here it is the narrator’s new-found younger sister, Adriana, who calls the narrator a “genius of verbs” (78) and is subsequently in turn described as “a genius, that Adriana” (133). (It must be admitted, however, that almost any novel is bound to suffer in a comparison with My Brilliant Friend. Di Pietrantonio’s is not a bad book, but it does not have the texture and finely-judged ambivalence sustained at such length by Ferrante’s magnum opus.)

A Girl Returned is perhaps most interesting for what it has to say about memory and forgetting. Like both Nada and My Brilliant Friend, its story is told by a narrator who is recounting her experience at a much later date. (We are teased with fleeting references to what must have happened in the meantime: her youngest brother is now in an institution, for instance; Adriana may soon be getting married.) As such, she reviews and reflects on the gap between what she realizes now and what she did not know then. Thinking back, for instance, she is kinder and less judgemental towards her biological parents than she was at the time. She is drawn to moments of light amidst what was often darkness and even violence: “Every so often I think again,” for example she tells us, “of the hand of the first [mother] that for a few moments rested on my shoulder, at school. I still wonder why she placed it there, a woman so sparing of caresses” (129). Ferrante’s narrator–if we have to make the comparison–is by contrast much less forgiving of her own mother, even if she can similarly see that the older woman’s defects are the result of a struggle against a harsh and inhospitable environment for women of her class and [lack of] social status.

Softened perhaps by memory and time passing, Di Pietrantonio’s narrator is even surprisingly generous towards an older brother who is a hair’s breadth (or less) from taking advantage of her sexually. She is saved only by his sudden accidental death. Yet at the very end of the book (on its penultimate page) there is a moment of solemn mourning, as the narrator and her sister “silently [. . .] remember [. . .] him” (179) at the very beach where he had first acted on his incestuous desire, kissing her open-mouthed (53). One would have thought this would be something the narrator would want to forget.

But her greatest fear is to be forgotten. Even as she is with her biological family, she continually hopes that she may be reunited with her former mother, and has to believe that she has not been forgotten by her. She clings on to the hope that, even if her adoptive mother is not in touch with her, this must be for some good reason–perhaps because she is in hospital; or even because she is dead. If she is alive, however, she must surely be thinking about her “lost” daughter, and at some point will come to take her back. But she is not always able to sustain this hope: “In certain melancholy moods, I felt forgotten. I’d fallen out of her thoughts. There was no longer any reason to exist in the world. I softly repeated the word mamma a hundred times, until it lost all meaning and was only an exercise of the lips” (115). And when the narrator learns the true reason why she was “returned” to her biological family–her adoptive mother, who previously thought herself infertile, gets pregnant–the worst thing she can imagine doing in revenge is to erase her erstwhile mother from her memory: “I immediately decided not to see her Again [. . .]. I truly lost her, and for a few hours I thought I could forget her” (128).

Of course, she cannot fully forget, and by the novel’s end, after a rather excruciating dinner, she can see her adoptive mother as herself a victim, constrained by rules to which she only unwillingly agrees. More generally, at last the narrator seems able to let go of motherhood entirely, and certainly the idealization of mothers. It seems significant that, so far as we can tell, the narrator has not had any children. Mothers cannot protect you–if anything, whatever their best intentions, they only make things worse. It is thanks to her “alliance” with her sister that the two of them are said, at the book’s conclusion, to have “survived” (170). And together, the two sisters care for their disadvantaged younger brother, visiting him regularly, bringing him strawberries: “Then he eats them, after holding them up to the light, one by one, gripping them by the stem. He observes the tiny variations in shape, in color. I suspect that he’s trying to count all those seeds on the surface” (113). These are the relationships, and these the observations of detail and minor difference, that ultimately matter. This, perhaps, is what is worth remembering for Di Pietrantonio.

The Savage Detectives IV: A Chill Descends from the North Pole

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Part Two of Bolaño’s novel ranges far and wide, both temporally and geographically. As its subtitle indicates, it covers the period from 1976 to 1996. And it takes us from Mexico to Europe (France, Spain, Austria…), the Middle East, and then Africa (Angola, Rwanda, Liberia).

Yet in another sense, all this is encompassed in a single night in a Mexico City apartment, sometime presumably in November or December, 1975, in which Amadeo Salvatierra talks to the “boys,” Ulises Lima and Arturo Belano, about the forgotten poet, Cesárea Tinajero. Part Two opens with Salvatierra’s account (apparently recorded in January 1976): “My dear boys, I said to them, I’m so glad to see you, come right in, make yourselves at home” (143). We also periodically but consistently return to their conversation as Part Two continues, breaking what is otherwise the chronological order of events and interviews. And it ends back in Salvatierra’s apartment, with the dawn breaking and the streets outside the windows beginning to fill up with people, with one of the boys (we do not know which) leafing through the magazine containing Tinajero’s sole published poem, and the other asleep or half-asleep on the sofa but still somehow responding to Amadeo’s query as to why they want to find Tinajero now: “we’re doing it for Mexico, for Latin America, for the Third World, for our girlfriends, because we feel like doing it. [. . .] we’re going to find Cesárea Tinajero and we’re going to find the Complete Works of Cesárea Tinajero” (587–88). This, however, elicits a “shiver” from Salvatierra, and the sense, as one of the boys puts it, that “the North Pole had descended on Mexico City” (588). Part Two ends with a chill, perhaps a blast of cold air sweeping over the boys’ youthful ambitions. Or are those ambitions themselves the source of the chill that seeps into Salvatierra’s apartment? Or is it that the aged Salvatierra, looking around the wreckage not only of one drunken night but also of a lifetime (“my books, my photographs, the stains on the ceiling”) knows that the path Lima and Belano are taking will lead them only to failure and disillusion?

The book is not yet over (we still have Part Three to come), but Lima and Belano’s stories are now done by the time Part Three ends. Their fates, and that of the other visceral realist group, are briefly summarized by one Ernesto García Grajales, who claims to be “the foremost scholar in the field, the definitive authority” but also “the only person who cares” (584). Not that García Grajales seems to care all that much: all this is merely fodder for a “little book” that he hopes “will do well” (585). And so he goes down the list: “María Font lives in Mexico City. [. . .] Shte writes, but she doesn’t publish. Ernesto San Epifanio died. [. . .] Ulises Lima still lives in Mexico City. [. . .] About Arturo Belano I know nothing” (594–85). And of course, of our voluble narrator from Part One of the novel: “García Madero? No the name doesn’t ring a bell. He never belonged to the group. Of course I’m sure. Man, if I tell you so as the reigning expert on the subject, it’s because that’s the way it is” (585). So much for expertise, of course. (We know otherwise, and better.) But also so much for García Madero, so full of hope and expectation when we last caught sight of him, over 400 pages ago, but who has been completely lost to memory, either official or unofficial, almost as though he had never existed.

What mark does our passage through this world leave? What impact do we have on those around us, or even on fate or destiny? What remains of us when our story comes to an end? Who will tell our story when we are gone? These, I think, are some of the questions Bolaño asks us, and his answers may sometimes leave us chilled.

Arguedas Tour: Puquio

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Arguedas’s life was full of movement, and this transience began in his early childhood. Son of an itinerant mestizo lawyer, whose wife (Arguedas’s mother) died while young José María was still an infant, he was constantly on the move, often cared for by relatives. Initially, his travels and displacements took him around the southern highlands, and the provinces of Apurímac, Ayacucho, and Cusco. Later, he would be enrolled in secondary schools on the coast, first in Ica and then in Lima, with a stint in Huancayo (in Junín) in between.

Some of this time was spent in or near the town of Puquio, in Ayacucho, which today is on the road that connects Nazca to Cusco (and on, even as far as Brazil). Puquio was the home of Arguedas’s stepmother, who holds a special place in the writer’s childhood trauma and mythology: apparently resentful of his very existence, she relegated him to the kitchen with the household’s Indigenous servants, who taught him Quechua and “treated [him] just as if [he] were on of their own.” This association with Peru’s Indigenous culture would stay with him for the rest of his life.

Arguedas would go on to revisit Puquio both as an anthropologist, undertaking fieldwork and research in and around the town, and as an author, making it the setting for his first novel, Yawar fiesta, whose title combines Quechua (Yawar) and Spanish (fiesta): “Blood Festival.”

Yawar fiesta is as much about the town as it is about any individual characters. Indeed, arguably most of the characters are collective: the “mistis” or “principales” who are the landowners and merchants; the subprefect who represents the state; the town residents who have migrated to Lima, but now return for its annual celebration of national independence; and above all the “comuneros,” members of the town’s four ayllus, or Indigenous communities. The ayllus both collaborate and compete to put on the show that gives the novel its title: a bullfight that the other characters disdain as barbaric and dangerous, but which, when plans to modernize or “civilize” it fail, the mistis ultimately embrace as if it were their own.

Moreover, the novel opens with a visual description of the town as seen by a traveller arriving at the pass that gives access to the valley in which the town is set, offering a view in which the rooves and spires of the ayllus stand out: “‘Indian town!’ exclaim the travelers when they reach this summit and spy Puquio” (1).

We must have passed through or near this pass on our way to Puquio, but in the early dawn as our coach from Lima approached the town, it was not about to stop for us to take in the view. Later, however, we had lunch at a restaurant on the other side of the valley, from which we could see a similar vista to the one Arguedas describes. And although the landowners’ dominance has long faded, with agrarian reform and the break-up of the haciendas, the four distinct communities, each with their own small plaza and church, are still clearly visible.

It doesn’t take too long to walk around Puquio, which has scarcely grown (only from 14,000 inhabitants to just under 16,000) in the decades since Arguedas was here. We visited all the plazas and churches. There are few modern buildings, though apparently the town hall had to be rebuilt after it was bombed by Sendero Luminoso in 1992. Few if any buildings are more than two stories high. On the outskirts of town, on a small hill, is a bullring, fenced off and contained.

My friend Carmen’s father comes from Puquio, and her family still has a house there, a few blocks from the main square. It is rundown and barely habitable; the family has neither the time nor the resources to figure out what exactly to do with it. But it is also a very material connection, remnant and reminder for a generation that moved to the coast and reinvented themselves there, becoming fully limeños, but never fully forgot their ties to the sierra.

There are plenty of signs of Arguedas in Puquio. A school is named after him, and a restaurant has the name “Misitu,” after the untamed bull that the comuneros bring down from the mountains in Yawar fiesta. In the main square is a statue of the writer, standing and wearing a flowing poncho, book in hand, apparently reading or declaiming to us below. In another square is a statue of a condor atop a bull, another version of the yawar fiesta (or turupukllay) that Arguedas’s novel mentions, but doesn’t describe at length, but which here and elsewhere has come to stand in for the novel as a whole. So this remembering is in part a misremembering.

Similarly, some have suggested that Arguedas’s own childhood reminiscences are unreliable. In José María Arguedas: Biografía y suicidio, Hugo Chacón Málaga argues at length that the writer’s mother was actually an Indigenous woman with whom his father must have had an affair. Whatever the truth of the matter (it seems unlikely to me), the point is that Arguedas’s story about the past was generative for his subsequent work: a story that, either way, is about fictive kinship, imagined relations that come to outweigh the real.

As the sun went down, we went to a small café run by a friend of Carmen’s. He called on a couple of musicians, who played huaynos (Andean ballads or laments) on a guitar and a charango, chatting and drinking with us for several hours. The songs came from various regions of the southern highlands, and the talk was both of Puquio and of other places, both near and far. It was a very Arguedian way to spend the evening.